Sunday, July 10, 2005
Killer Kebab
so i'm rushin home the other night to meet with margaret, an artist whom i met through the web while i was in the process of heading to antarctica. figuring i don't have enough time to cook something, i dash into the local Sinbad's Kebab Shop and grab the usual chicken kebab - no carrots, onions and with the hot spicy sauce. it's a good eat.
so i'm here at the house trying to quickly eat this killer kebab and something happened that i've NEVER experienced before. this kinda ties into when chris said i looked like Jim Rose after i lopped off all my hair, because for a few ugly minutes, i certainly felt like one of his crew in some twisted side show of freaks.
i took a bite, tried to swallow and must have taken a weird breath or something because not all of that particular bite went DOWN - some of it went UP and INTO my nasal cavity. you ever seen people do that thing where they suck up a piece of pasta through their nose and then spit the end out their mouth? well, i was about to travel that very same path only in reverse and with a piece of angry killer lettuce instead.
the sensation was very unusual, it kinda tickled yet at the same time it burned due to the chilis (see the photo) in the hot spicy sauce. there i am jumping up from the table hackin, coughin, laughin and now tearin at the eyes because of the pepper sauce which is now laying a nice burning trail all through my nasal cavity. i was thinkin to myself "it tickles, it burns, it tickles, it feels like a booger - a burning booger that's making me cry". the laughter and insanity ensued as i tried desperately to figure out how to get this thing out of my head. to the bathroom for more hacking and looking in the mirror. i see nothing! i then tried blowing my nose and after a few beefy pressure backed blasts i had freed this evil piece of burning death lettuce. after having it conclude it's circuitous route from my mouth out through my nose via the nasal cavity, i wiped the remainder of the tears from my eyes, then sat down and happily devoured the remainder of the kebab as retribution.
so i'm rushin home the other night to meet with margaret, an artist whom i met through the web while i was in the process of heading to antarctica. figuring i don't have enough time to cook something, i dash into the local Sinbad's Kebab Shop and grab the usual chicken kebab - no carrots, onions and with the hot spicy sauce. it's a good eat.
so i'm here at the house trying to quickly eat this killer kebab and something happened that i've NEVER experienced before. this kinda ties into when chris said i looked like Jim Rose after i lopped off all my hair, because for a few ugly minutes, i certainly felt like one of his crew in some twisted side show of freaks.
i took a bite, tried to swallow and must have taken a weird breath or something because not all of that particular bite went DOWN - some of it went UP and INTO my nasal cavity. you ever seen people do that thing where they suck up a piece of pasta through their nose and then spit the end out their mouth? well, i was about to travel that very same path only in reverse and with a piece of angry killer lettuce instead.
the sensation was very unusual, it kinda tickled yet at the same time it burned due to the chilis (see the photo) in the hot spicy sauce. there i am jumping up from the table hackin, coughin, laughin and now tearin at the eyes because of the pepper sauce which is now laying a nice burning trail all through my nasal cavity. i was thinkin to myself "it tickles, it burns, it tickles, it feels like a booger - a burning booger that's making me cry". the laughter and insanity ensued as i tried desperately to figure out how to get this thing out of my head. to the bathroom for more hacking and looking in the mirror. i see nothing! i then tried blowing my nose and after a few beefy pressure backed blasts i had freed this evil piece of burning death lettuce. after having it conclude it's circuitous route from my mouth out through my nose via the nasal cavity, i wiped the remainder of the tears from my eyes, then sat down and happily devoured the remainder of the kebab as retribution.